The worst part about this stupid mood is I don’t know why I’m in it but it’s bad. I can’t hardly stand myself right now. The world and everything in it just sucks right now.
If anything could make me happy I don’t know what it would possibly be. I’ve tried workin’ on this blog, I even expanded it to include one just for my little tutorials, that hasn’t made me happy.
I’ve tried gettin’ up and away from the computer, thinkin’ I might be gettin’ sensory overload or some stupid shit like that, well that didn’t work either.
I wanted to have a cookout today but I don’t have the fixin’s, no way to get ’em and it’s been pourin’ down the rain for the last 3 hours, so that’s out the freakin’ window with a smile and a wave too.
This mood isn’t bein’ helped by the fact that I can’t type, I have to constantly go back and fix my errors, which takes more time to do than type this post. I don’t know how many times I wished I could type really good, not have to look at the keyboard and just type away, bein’ able to concentrate on what I want to say instead of havin’ to look up and down all the damn time.
My four year old son and my 87 year old mom can do nothin’ but fight today, one hollerin’ at the other for some stupid reason. If it was important I would be able to understand but it’s always over something that makes no difference. They just like to bicker and fuss.
Somethin’ else thats really gotten under my skin, literally, is my right shoulder. The pain is ever present and very distractin’ from everyday life, such as it is. I’m sick to death of the constant hurtin’ and I can’t get my Dr. to do anything about it. Oh, she wants to send me to an orthopedic Dr. to see what they can do about it but once again I don’t have a way to get there and I can’t leave my mom alone anyhow. I might be able to get my brother to sit with her long enough for me to go but he’s busy movin’ now so it’s gonna be a while.
I know that everybody has bad days, and everybody gets grouchy, but I stated once in a post that this blog is my emotional outlet. In fact, it’s the only outlet that I have at the moment. Maybe somebody readin’ this will think “Wow, that’s just how I feel”.
If you’re havin’ a bad day or a few of them, comment me and let me know, we can share in each others misery.
Thanks for readin’.